So this week was one of those “anything that can go wrong will go wrong” kind of weeks. I don’t know if it was just the fact that the house stuff was coming up so soon or what, but I just felt like I couldn’t focus on anything. All at once there just felt like so much to do, and yet at the end of each day I didn’t really feel like I had accomplished a single thing. And now I feel simultaneously overwhelmed and disappointed. I didn’t think this week would be so unproductive, and I’ve definitely lost steam over the new project I wanted to start working on, and I barely got started.
And to top it off, the week ended with one of the worst days I’ve experienced to my memory, materializing in an entire day spent in an online brawl with someone I love very much. Imagine one of those silly laughable comment wars you see online, except it’s not silly and it’s not laughable, and it’s very serious, and it’s actually having a very large impact on your relationship and sense of self because you actually have to keep reminding yourself that you love this person even though you’re having the hardest time believing that right now. It’s truly bewildering to me the extent and power of misinformation. I know it exists, and that it’s a problem, and that I more than likely have consumed misinformation here and there. But at least I try to be vigilant and discern what flaws and biases might be at play. I’m not perfect, but at least I can admit that, instead of believing that I am above manipulation and influence. All that to say, the conversation didn’t go well at all, and if I was already running on low fumes before yesterday I’m just about wiped at this point.
I still want to close off with some wins, because this week was a totally horrible week and I want to remind myself of that. For one, I made some progress on some additional artwork that I’m preparing for my home decor. Not too much, but at least it’s a start! Hopefully I’ll be able to do more this coming week since I’ll be off from work to focus on house stuff. I got another paid promotion opportunity! I was referred to the opportunity thanks to a wonderful person in the IG community, and I’m really excited to be able to not just support a cause that I care about, but to also be able to monetize some of my work a little more!
I hope next week will be better. Without having to manage everything I’m doing with work, I do think that will help me out a lot and allow me to take a breath and get some more things that I’ve been putting off finally done. I'm definitely looking forward to the SHINee concert tomorrow (!!!!!) I think that will do wonders for my mood and really help me psyche myself up for taking on the week ahead!